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Would you be kind enough to help me like my picture so that I can win this competition?

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Much much love! *Group hug*

Thanks!

Gentleness - a value often neglected.

As I was praying in my shower and continued until the moment before I shut my eyes for sleep, God repeatedly impress the word 'Gentleness' into my heart. I ignored it at first. Thinking that God should have more important things to tell me. But as I kept praying, the impression of the word became stronger..

So I said "Alright God, what can I do with gentleness in my life?" Little answers came in such as "be gentle as you speak", "be gentle in your approach", "be gentle and not be in anger when you're offended" etc.

So I kept them in mind and went to bed. I'm not quite sure about you, but it is true that gentleness has not really been a value in my life. Especially when I feel offended. Though my response may not be extreme, but it's still not 'gentle'. And most of the time when I pray, I would ask God to help me have wisdom, discernment, faith, patience etc. But I never prayed for God to help me cultivate gentleness in my life.

This morning, I decided to go deeper in the word "Gentleness". As I began to ask God to help me cultivate this value, He began to show me what can it do.

- Gentleness eliminates the fear of authority. There can be openness in a relationship between leaders and members. Harshness kills all these.

- Gentleness touches the heart. Harshness hurts the heart.

- Gentleness is a pathway to a second chance, a pathway to hope. Our God of a second chance is a gentle God.
Psalm 18:35
You have also given me the shield of Your salvation;Your right hand has held me up, Your gentleness has made me great.

- Gentleness restores even with rebukes.
A mother who rebukes in gentleness is likely to teach and restore her children into their God given destiny, to become who they are meant to be.
A mother who rebukes bluntly without considering her words is likely to damage the soul and heart of her child. Causing them to think of themselves worthless.

- Gentleness is the number 1 value of a wife.
A wife who tries to make everything in order in the house will only rob the husband of his God given position as the head of the house. Relationships will be torn and the family will collapse.
A wife who supports with gentleness allows God to restore her man into his God given authority in the house. It takes time, but with her love and gentleness, they will make it and the house will be strong.

Before I ended my prayer time, God said a final word to me:
Gentleness is the value of a woman of God. For a woman of God is called to love and nurture in gentleness.

State of the Arts KL - 17 Nov 2010

Yo! State of The Arts KL is here!!!
Check this out!!!!
Personally, I guess I'm gonna join the State of Curiosity - Art Installation category.

What about you? :)

Happy Pill 08.10.10

Beautiful things makes me happy. That's my passion. =)

Made the clouds out of some materials a few days ago. Love it! Perhaps I can sell my design. Anyone wanna buy? Haha :)

5 times to the Merlion in 2010... and it's still counting!

Gosh I can't believe it! I've been to S'pore 5 times this year. Never knew I was that rich! =P

But.. why go so many times? Let's see...

First visit during Feb 2010

Oh yeah we went to Sentosa! And I couldn't enter the casino because I'm underage =S

And we had a jump shot outside of Universal Studios. It was still under construction. The tickets to go in just to "VIEW" the place SOLD OUT!

Celebrated Ms. Chuah's 20th Birthday at Max Brenner VivoCity. The one in Aussie is still BETTER! (I miss my strand of purple hair!)

And of course, the main reason we went there was for Kathy's 22nd Birthday too!

Second visit during April 2010

One of my favourite desserts in S'pore! Chewy Junior!(That's Kathy's foot!)

Mr. Wang Wei Keat brought me to this place for dessert before our meal.
And we went to this super yummy toad/frog porridge in Geylang. Oh that's his hand scooping the porridge.

The next day I went for the CHC morning service, Special service with John Bevere at HOGC too but I didn't manage to take pictures there. And guess what, after 2 services I rushed to somewhere called "Lakeside" to be the last minute performing artist with Sharon Boon. We sang 2 songs in front of a bunch of Singaporeans, one written by Sharon herself and another by her Er Jie Shirley Boon. Great experience. You can find the videos on my facebook page *winks*

Camehoring in the MRT.Oh! Not forgetting Jia Yang that brought me to HOGC!

Third visit during May-June 2010

As seat fillers, we have the privilege to sit in front, in the midst of all the man and women of God from all over the world. Thus, a group pic with brother John!!!

Yup! That's how I look like almost 24/7. Every time I come out from every session, 1 sms will come in in one minutes, sometimes 2 smses in a minute and phone calls come raining in. Doing admin for 1000 people is not easy! (Hui Fen beside was trying accompany me being stressed. I'm not stressed though, just TIRED!)

Omg! Diana says this pic is like I'm forcing people to buy bak chang! hahaha busy girl having hundreds of passes to delegate!Grand finale. See our happy faces!

Fourth visit during Sept 2010

SOT graduation pic with Lionel Choong! The superstar Mr. Asia Conference 2010. The only new friend I made during AC cause I worked with him most of the time. Oh! He's nice to work with.

2010 SOT Grads of CHCKL (Chia Huey missing)

Whole kampung went to support the graduation of Sharon Rainie Boon!

Met them for dessert too!
My favourite durian dessert! Oh yeah! :D

Fifth visit during Oct 2010

Went to spend time with me bestie. But wrong timing! She got tests and midterms :( Oh! she slept with all the green stuff and let me sleep on her bed. How sweet!

Our random lunch at Ikea SG. (Love my kids meal - 5 Swedish beef balls and 2 pancakes!)

FINISHED!

All my friends tells me that Singapore is my second home. I have my own S'pore number and ezlink card. So, you judge for yourself! Haha. Nonetheless, it's a place that I love. Love the surroundings, church and my loved ones there!

Values that creates my life.

It has been 3 years and 4 months since I left my little beloved hometown - Taiping and search for my future and destiny here in KL.

Many said I've changed. Most of them thinks it's a good change. Well, at least those are the ones that told me so. Hee..

So what's the change here?

I guess the first change is having a whole new set of values in my life. Yes, I learnt them from church. Check this out! :)
It's posted on twitter by Shirley Boon. She shaped a big part of the values of my life.

I've started 2010 strong. Went to Taiwan, Singapore and even led a mission team myself. Then it was time for Asia Conference, where I dealt with stress that came in from 800 people and also learn to manage my emotions. I missed Asia Conference. I really do.

But to me, the hardest and greatest value that I've learnt this year is to embrace change. I'm not a person who likes changes. But it's the most constant thing in life. I've experienced a change of living environment, change of needs from the people around me and even change in my relationships.

In case you don't know, I'm a people person. Kinda an extreme one. So the toughest to me is of course the change in my relationships. I've experienced betray by someone close to my heart, cheating and lying about me just to protect ones self, a group of close friends getting attached or moving to the workplace one by one and have lesser time for me etc!

Many times I wished things will never change. Many times I wished we can go back to the good old times once again. That's a super selfish thought of mine. People need to grow. Whatever in life that does not grow is dead. There are seasons in our life.

So this is a season for me to learn. To learn how to love in a greater depth. To love even when people or things are unlovable. To do what is best for others in the expense of myself. (sounds very great and impossible?) Well, it's doable. Because love is not a feeling. Love is a choice! You can choose to love despite the circumstance.

You don't learn something until you know how to do it. I've learnt the real meaning of the word 祝福.

Jesus chose to love us when we're unlovable. I thank God that He's my model of love. If you wanna know what love is? Study His life.

Or....... you can try listening to this song by Jaeson Ma and Bruno Mars:

Man and Women that has Impacted My Life!

In no particular order, these are the people whom I really admire and look up to and desire to be like them 1 day:

1. Lisa Bevere - She's a powerful women who won battles that every women would face and her heart's desire is to strengthen and awaken all the women to win this battle. My favourite author and my highest search in iTunes.

2. Reinhard Bonnke - A man of God who is as young as a youth in heart even at his age. Because of his obedience and faith, heaven is packed and hell is emptied.

3. Jaeson Ma - A transformed man of God with the gift of rap preaching. Inspired by how he set his life apart for purity and how he uses his talent and love for people to reach out to the youths and celebrities. His documentary 1040 planted a very important seed in my heart.
4. Rick Joyner - An author whom books I read has transformed my life totally. Books of his that I've read - The Final Quest and The Call. Saving up to buy the 3rd sequel book.
5. Pastor Kong Hee - The man of God that built my church and made my faith possible. I'm never where I am today without him.
6. Sun Ho - She's an ordinary women that is transformed by God in every single way, with one thing called Obedience. I admire her talent, her courage and her influence in the world. :)
7. Pastor Kevin and Esther - Man and Women of God who sows into my life every week through their preaching, hard work for big days and celebrations. They built my family! :)
8. Aunty Naomi - The mother of the women who impacted my life most. Without her, I wouldn't have such a wonderful mentor, leader, sister and friend. Aunty Naomi prays in tongues all day long even when she's sweeping the floor, doing the dishes or walking to the mall.

9. Shirley Boon - The first day I stepped into her CG, there was an unexplainable spiritual connection with her. It made me desire for more and kept going back to just be where this women is to draw from her. She's everything I want to be like. She's the first person in this world who showed me that she believed in me even when I can't even believe in myself. She showed me faith, hope and love.
10. Last but not least, my mother Rachel Yen - A women who decided to gave me life even when her spouse did not. She fought through the years of being a single mother, went through all the hardship and still holding on because of me and my brother. The fine lines on her face were formed because of me.

Random Scribblessss

Who's being neglected now?

One of my once in a blue moon but deadly emotional attacks came to the visit again. I don't know about you, but this is a battle i need to fight since I was a kid due to my family back ground and upbringing. It is a very strong feeling of being neglected and unloved and it happens when people around me are too busy for me, they don't count me into their outings or when they left me out on a movie session. The question frequently revolves around my self value in someone Else's eyes. Thoughts such as "Others are more important than me" or "I'm always secondary" would flood my mind and bring my whole person to the lowest pit.

I've seek for help and read hundreds of books. The one and only solution that is really working for me is to find my security in God alone. Now, what does it mean to do that? How can I do that if I don't even know who or 'what' is this God you're talking about? For me, when these attacks come, I would usually cry myself to sleep alone in my bed room. But as I began to go to church and read the bible, I found out that the way God looked at me was different from how I looked at myself. I thought nobody is interested to care about me. But God said He knew me in my mother's womb and has plans for me even before I was born. I thought I am always a notch lower than others. But God said I was made to be the head and not the tail. I thought I am weak and useless. But God said I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me and when I am weak, He is strong. As I began to read even more or listen to Pastor's preaching, I realized I was made for a great purpose. And my life is a beautiful design. I'm not an unwanted child of my parents that they didn't happen to abort, I am fearfully and wonderfully made. The best thing is, there is someone that actually died for me so that all my sins(the lies that I've spoke, wrong things that I've done, rules that I've broke) would be taken away from me and I can be pure and clean once again! Wow! Don't you think that's amazing? I definitely prefer to believe that I'm created by an awesome God who loves me than believing that I'm an evolution of the monkeys!

Well, knowing all these and feeling happy about it is one thing. But having it as a head knowledge simply isn't enough. How can I actually apply it in my life? Well, thank God the bible teaches us all things! That is why it is called Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth you see.. Haha..

^{Romans 10:9
9} that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.

*Tadaaa* One of the ways that I've learned is confessing! 1 year ago, the very same attack came upon me when I was driving alone to the shopping mall. I was all upset and was ready to cry and the Holy Spirit came and challenged me to speak into my situation. I actually ignored it at the first place as I was very comfortably victimizing myself. But on the other hand, I didn't want to go to the mall with a sour face too. It was tough and hard. Finally, I stood up and did it. I still remembered the first thing that came out from my mouth was "This is not the truth!" and then I kept confessing my victory over this whole situation based on the word of God. What came to my horror was that I didn't felt better. The self pityness became stronger and I cried even harder. But I kept pressing on, kept on believing and proclaiming my victory. It was really a hard and tough journey. But as I kept doing it for 5 minutes, the whole atmosphere changed suddenly. My self pity feelings disappeared. Tears were still coming down from my eyes, but I just felt alright and VICTORIOUS! WOW! That was the first time I won the battle! Hazel always told me to stand up and fight! And she said that once you won the first battle, the rest of it would be a piece of cake. I was so okay and I went to the mall to shop happily :D

So there goes my first time. Yes of course it comes back. But each and every time it becomes easier and easier to overcome. Thinking about it reminds me that what Dr. Cho taught in Asia Conference 2010 was true! Our words and vision are the only things that can enter the 4th dimension. Words can be heard but cannot be felt and seen. It is something in the 3rd dimension that carries the characteristic of the 4th dimension. Wow! There is power in my confession and proclamation! And trust me, I've changed from crying myself to sleep to praying and worshiping God for 15 minutes!

This time it came again with it's usual ways. So I grabbed the guitar and began to pray.. Yes, the feelings are strong, I felt abandoned, rejected and neglected. Tears began to flood my eyes as I was praying. But all of a sudden, I moved into a different perspection. Something inside of me stirred me and asked this question "How was God feeling?" I felt so shock and guilty trying to answer the question. Yes, there were many times when I was thinking about what to do at night after classes, my answers would be watching movies, catching up with friends, shopping etc etc. Rarely did the thought of "I'm free tonight! Whatcha wanna do God?" appeared in my mind. Don't get me wrong, I do my devotions, but what I'm trying to say here is I realized that devotion is not enough. Rather than arranging our time with God like our classes which is from 9-10 in the morning, He should be someone we dine with, someone we hang out with and date!

This is the lesson I've learnt. God is my best friend and yet I neglected Him without knowing it. I'm learning and changing. What about you? Would you tell your friends you have something on tonight and that something is actually your date with God?

Desires.

Well, if you've been following my blog, you will realized that it's a blog that you can 'learn' from. Not that I'm very good in philosophies or whatsoever, it's just that I'm a thinker and I get excited over the revelations that I get rather than my mood swings or emotions. And besides, it would be a great thing that others can gain from my posts too.
But today, I guess I'm gonna talk about myself for a little.These few weeks has been very exciting, full of ups and downs, challenging and fulfilling!
I have been constantly enlarging myself with different tasks, spontaneous decisions, meeting different expectations. But His faithfulness never ends. =)

As I grow, the things around me will 'grow' too. And eventually they grew old and die or some decided to ran away from home! So this is the season that I need a lot of new things. But then, I can only wait and pray. No money lah $_$
Let's look at the list...

1. Mattress. (The one I'm sleeping on now totally koyaks. Every night I can feel the spring pocking my back!
2. Purse. (The current beautiful purple purse is now known as The big-hole purple purse.)3. Bed sheets. (BIG BIG hole on my bed sheet!)4. Ear phone. ( AC is coming. Some music will definitely help in the long Q. Maybe an IPOD TOUCH with some games would be even better! =P)
5. Laptop. (check out the terrible keyboard.)6. Shoes/Pumps/Flats (Need something comfy for the 5 days of AC.)
7. A new pair of wedges. (The old one died long time ago)
8. Clothes. (The last top I bought was the subzone T-shirt ='( )
9. Lomo camera. (Always wanted to explore lomography. But knowing myself, I was afraid that I'll be broke buying and developing films. Perhaps anyone wants to borrow me their camera for a day or 2?)
10. Make up. (That is the little compact powder that I have left and the REMAINING LENGTH of my eye liner. No joke!)
Ok that is the 10 things. There are ALOT more. I'm too lazy to list them down...

Oh wait! And not forgetting, I want a BB so that I can keep in touch with Kathy and others who are overseas.

Oh well................... Without them, I'm still surviving today. So I suppose I can still survive until the $$$$$$ or *blessing* come in. So, pray with me folks! *mwahs*

T.R.U.T.H

As I was doing my devotion and reading the bible today, i word that really captured my attention and hit me hard is the word TRUTH.

It's a very simple word, a word that may not even capture our attention, but yet it is a very powerful wordl. So people ask, why do we believe in Jesus? Most of us will say it is because of His love. But taking a deeper thought, what makes His love more powerful than the love that other 'gods' give is that His love is the truth. We hold on, we believe, we love, because He is true.

When Adam and Eve sinned, the highlight is actually not on the fruit that they ate, but it's on the life of truth that they failed to live.They hid, they ran, they accused one another and they failed to face the truth that they had done something wrong. Just like all of us today. I believe not many of us has the courage to strip our masks off and tell the world who we really are. Our life is surrounded by sin. But how many of us can stand up and tell people how ugly we are? If this is the truth to you, I believe you still do know Jesus. You do not know His love at all.

1 John 4:17-19 (New King James Version)

The Consummation of Love

17 Love has been perfected among us in this: that we may have boldness in the day of judgment; because as He is, so are we in this world. 18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. 19 We love Him because He first loved us.

His love is to enable us to have boldness when our sins are judged.
His love casts out all fear. And that includes the fear of rejection from people, the fear of losing the good impression people have towards you.
His love is patient and understanding in a world of intolerance.
His love brings clarity of mind to those who are confused, rest to the weary, hope to the hopeless and strength to those who feel that they can't go on.
His love can heal and mend a broken heart.
His love drives away darkness.

There is no problem too big for His love to contain. It is so pure and simple. But for a lot of people, it could be the scariest thing on earth for them. And that is the ultimate goal that the devil wants to achieve - to cause people to fear light and desire darkness so that they can be added as a captive to him.

If you cannot live in truth, you are the first one rejecting yourself.

I've been through darkness. I loved the way it protected my ugliness. But one day light came in. It showed me truth. It wasn't easy. But the day I stepped in, I never have to live in darkness again.

3 John 3:3
3 For I rejoiced greatly when brethren came and testified of the truth that is in you, just as you walk in the truth.

We live because of truth so we need to live in truth and show the world truth.

Easter.

This post is written specially for my beloved CG members. I'm so proud of all of you for working tirelessly in bringing your friends to church in every big day. You guys are really AMAZING!

But in the midst of our hard work, let's not forget the true purpose of Easter. Let's not forget the message and real meaning of Easter.
Easter is the celebration of the resurrection of our Lord Jesus Christ. But in the midst of our busyness, our big day, our events, our new friends, let's not forget to give thanks to the one who died for us and rose again that we may have a new life.

As all of us know, Adam and Eve sinned against God and since then, the relationship between human beings and God was broken. And the consequences of sin is death, but because God loved us so much, He sent Jesus to die on the cross. So that He as a sinless man would be crucified with all our sins and that we may be pure and holy again through Him. And the best thing is, He conquered death and rose again and defeated the power of Satan. The resurrection of Christ is so important that our it is the foundation of our faith. Do read http://www.konghee.com/www/2010/03/did-jesus-resurrect-from-the-dead/ and learn about Jesus' resurrection.

Today, as we work hard for Easter, I would like to share with you the story of Mary and Martha.
^{Luke 10:38-42 (NLT)
38} As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. ³⁹ Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord’s feet, listening to what he taught. ⁴⁰ But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.”

⁴¹ But the Lord said to her, “My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! ⁴² There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Just like Martha, we may all be distracted or even felt that things were unfair when we serve the Lord.
Perhaps you may be trying to get the attendance from your group members but they have been reluctant in inviting their friends and they replied you late.
Or you may even feel that it is unfair that you have to arrange transport for everyone while the other members can enjoy going to church without going through all the fuss you are experiencing.
Or you may feel that it is unfair because you feel that you are working harder than any other member to bring your friends and you are not really appreciated.
Or you may even feel stress because you have 100 tasks ahead of you and I still push you to bring your friends to church for the weekend.

So perhaps these would be the thoughts that came through your mind..
I'm so frustrated! My group members are not cooperative. They're not replying my smses. I waste my money to text them and they take my sms for granted!
Or.. Why must I be the one who is arranging the transport? Can't someone else do it. It's so unfair!
Or.. I've been trying very hard to invite my friends. But they are just not responding. Other members have friends who are easier to deal with. Of course they can invite more.
Or.. I have my assignments, exams, quiz, now have to deal with Easter some more?! Burn out!
** Turn to your neighbor and say: I know she is not talking about you!**

Let's go back to the story in the bible. Mary was sitting at the feet of Jesus. She was spending time with Him and listening to His teachings. And because of that, she is not worried and upset about all the details. Does that mean that Mary was lazy to serve dinner to Jesus? No! Mary too loved Jesus as much as Martha. But her priority was different. She prioritized her relationship with Him over serving Him while Martha thought that she has to serve Him to prove her love to Him.

So could it be that because Martha did not spend time with Jesus, she was serving Him without knowing Him. And by that, she was serving without purpose and meaning. And because of that, she was distracted in her serving and she started comparing herself with her sister. Serving was no longer something personal that she wanted to offer to the Lord. And thus, she got offended at the end.

Guys, I know you guys want to work hard for Easter. We are all excited for the multiplication that is coming.
⁴² There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.”
Jesus said that there is only one thing to be concerned about, that is your relationship with Him. Do you know Jesus enough today? Do you know who is this God you are serving? Do you know the purpose of you bringing friends to Easter? What is the reason behind this hard work?

This Easter, even though we're bringing our friends, attending service with our friends and family let's prepare our hearts to get to know Jesus personally again. Let's desire and expect for more than what we already have.
Getting to know Jesus is a journey. And there is no end to it.
Serving Jesus is a joy. And it will be even joyful when you work partnering the holy spirit.
When you know Jesus, He will never be taken away from you.

I pray that this Easter, you will be able to encounter Him in a whole new level. Remember, when you take one step towards God, He will run 100 steps towards you.